“My Male Sex Doll Saved My Life”

A woman’s tale of how her sex toy proved it was worth every last penny she’d spent on it.

By Jessie Schiewe

Cue Bonnie Tyler’s “Holding Out For a Hero.” (Photo credit: www.sexdollcanada.com)

The sound of breaking glass is what woke Trinity up. 

Trinity — whose real name is not actually Trinity — is single and lives alone. She’s in her late 20s. 

This happened sometime in 2019, around 3 a.m., in a city somewhere on the East Coast, in a house that Trinity still lives in.

Her phone was charging across the room, but the intruder’s heavy footsteps, which were barreling down the hallway at a fast clip, made her too scared to grab it. He seemed to be heading directly to the bedroom, to where Trinity lay in bed too scared to move. 

He passed the living room, where the massive flat screen TV hung from the wall. He ignored the bathroom with its tempting medicine cabinets and the desktop and laptop computers in the study. 

By the time the intruder burst into the room, only a minute or maybe two had passed since Trinity had been woken up.

It had all happened so quickly, she didn’t know what to do other than to remain exactly where she was, pretending to be asleep. So that’s what she did, hoping the man would find the safe in her closet, pick it up, and then leave, forgetting all about her. 

As she lay on her side, eyes squeezed shut, she listened. Footsteps creaked nearby. They were heading closer to the bed. 

“I’m thinking: You have to fight back before he gets too close,” she wrote in a Reddit post later. “But then [I’m] thinking: What if he has a weapon?”

What happened next nobody expected — not Trinity, not the intruder, and certainly not the male sex doll lying next to her in bed. 

Read: “They Put My Face On Sex Toy Batteries”

The last time Trinity had sex with a man — as in a living, breathing, human one — was about five months ago. It left her unenthused.

“It wasn’t anything to write home about,” she told OK Whatever. 

Though she had a few dalliances in college — “It seemed like a requisite part of adulting” — she’s been single most of her adult life. Her longest relationship lasted for a year and a half. 

When you’re alone for so long, things can begin to lose their appeal. For Trinity, that happened with masturbating, both the manual way and with a vibrator.

“There was something very empty about cumming and then being all by myself.”

When a female friend confided about wanting to get a male sex doll, Trinity began considering it, too. 

“It was only after hearing her say it that it occurred to me that normal, everyday people can own them, and, even more radical, that I am an adult and can buy whatever I’d like regardless of society’s opinion.” 

Her friend ended up buying a male sex doll from an online store. But the woman regretted her purchase after the first time she used him. The way Trinity described it, her friend simply “realized it wasn’t at all what she expected and really not right for her.” 

Because she’d pleasured herself once using the sex doll, she couldn’t return him. So she stashed him in the attic until the day came when Trinity asked to see him. 

“I was blown away by how realistic it was,” she said, adding “I’m pretty sure she paid extra for increased limb flexibility.” 

Though she would have preferred a doll with more meat on his bones — “I’d be first in line to place a gentle giant on layaway” — Trinity was not ambivalent about his looks. 

She thought he looked “a lot” like the actor and comedian Adam Scott, of Party Down and Parks and Recreation fame, just “with a narrower face.” 

Trinity bought the doll from her friend in February, justifying it as “a Valentine’s Day present to myself.” She paid $1,400 and agreed to forgive a previous debt of $500 her friend owed. 

When Trinity picked up the doll, her friend informed her that he’d been thoroughly cleaned with soap, water, sanitary wipes, and an “oblong loofah” sponge. He was also fully clothed.

“I thought that was hysterical,” Trinity said. 

Once at home, she doused the figurine with an additional layer of Lysol. 

“I don’t have any photos of him, but here’s one of a similar-looking doll,” Trinity told OK Whatever. (Photo credit: www.sexdollcanada.com)

Integrating a sex doll into your life can feel weird, and maybe even a bit awkward. It did for Trinity, so she decided to give him a name: Silas.  

“When I first got him it was very strange to engage in something so intimate with something so inanimate and lifeless.

So he became Silas, a brooding but emotionally available snowboarder who can only be fully vulnerable around me, in the off-season.

It was very helpful to really get into it and lose myself in the moment.”

Not that “getting off” with Silas has proved to be an issue for Trinity. Even though his dick is made of plastic — “A constant reminder that it’s ultimately a fake toy and not the real deal” — it’s still “permanently hard” and 10-inches long. It can also be moved in any direction. 

“You can position it from flaccid, to practically a 90-degree angle, to anywhere in between.”

Having Silas in her life has also been educational. It’s allowed Trinity to delve more into her subconscious and better articulate the things that attract her. 

Fantasies about past boyfriends, old crushes, and even current-day coworkers have come to mind when she’s used the male sex doll. 

Lately, she’s been having fun imagining Silas as one of the celebrities she has the hots for, many of whom look nothing like the lean, muscular sex doll. Top on her list, as of early April, were Jason Momoa, Gabriel Iglesias, Robert Downy Jr., and Jonah Hill. 

Read: “Customers Sometimes Receive Unwanted Sex Toys From Amazon”

On the night of the home invasion, Trinity had “had a very nice...time” with Silas earlier in the evening and then fallen asleep with him next to her. 

“That’s not at all uncommon for me, to fall asleep afterwards with him still in the bed. It’s nice to have a human form to cuddle up with afterwards, even if he’s only still there out of my laziness.”

So Silas was there on that night, too, lying next to Trinity as the intruder lurked around. 

She listened as his footsteps neared the bed. They stopped within 5-feet of it. Then the man ran out of the house. 

Once she was sure he wasn’t coming back, Trinity called the police immediately. Then she threw on some clothes and stashed Silas in the closet. 

Trinity is private about owning a male sex doll. No one even knows she has him but for the friend she got him from. 

When she’s not using him for sexual pleasures, the doll remains in her closet. She keeps him fully-dressed so that if anyone ever stumbled upon him, she could pass him off as a mannequin. 

“I live in a fairly conservative area and work with a lot of our local population on sensitive matters, so I wouldn’t want some dumb neighborhood rumor to make anyone feel uncomfortable being open with me. I also wouldn’t want to lose friends or tarnish my reputation over it.”

So when the police came to take her statement, Trinity didn’t mention the sex doll. It wasn’t because she’d forgotten he’d been in bed with her; she just didn’t see the relevance. 

“If they’d asked, ‘Was there anything in bed with you?’ I’d have mentioned it right away.

But since they asked, ‘Was there anyone?’ I just thought, ‘No, absolutely not.’

It was as inconsequential and unrelated to a home invasion in my mind as having had a vibrator in bed with me.”

A few days later, the police caught the man who’d broken into Trinity’s home. Through questioning, they learned he’d come to rob her, that he’d been casing houses in the neighborhood for some time, and that hers seemed the easiest because it was a single-story, with a sliding glass door, and a woman who lived alone.

But his story still wasn’t adding up for the police. Why did he leave? Why didn’t he take anything? They still needed to know, so they had Trinity come down to the station to go over her statement one more time. She remembers they asked her questions like: “Do you date?” “Did anyone come over that night?” “Does anyone have keys to your place?”

She answered honestly for all of them. But she still didn’t think to bring up the sex doll.

“I thought it was to rule out the burglar being someone I knew or someone I was involved with.

Fucking an inanimate piece of plastic, even if it’s shaped like a human, is kind of the definition of being alone.

So it never crossed my mind that someone being home with me was on the table at all.”

Eventually the police laid it all out for Trinity. In his confession, the intruder had told them how he’d hit the bedroom first to look for jewelry in the drawers and designer clothing in the closet. Apparently, those kinds of items can be resold for the most money and are the easiest to walk out with and find buyers for. 

But he never got that far. Why? Because he noticed there was a dude in the bed, something he had not been expecting. Not wanting to wake him up and hoping to avoid a confrontation, the intruder decided to dip instead, ultimately taking nothing. 

It was at this point that Trinity sheepishly came clean about having had a male sex doll with her in bed that night. 

“If you saw Silas with the lights on, I doubt you’d mistake it for a real human being,” Trinity said. “But in dim lighting, it is a close call.”

The cops were understanding and had “a good laugh over it.” It’s not everyday you hear about a male sex doll helping to bungle a robbery. 

Read: “The Sex Shop Shaming Thieves on Social Media”

In the months since the attempted robbery, Trinity has made a slew of security upgrades to her home. She’s added “much more advanced locks” to her doors and windows, a Nest camera for her front entryway, and an extension cord long enough that she can charge her cell phone from her bed. 

Her parents have also been very supportive, chipping in on a few upgrades. They got her a home security system with motion detectors and her dad really wants her to let him buy her a gun. 

Still, she hasn’t told them the full-story of what happened on the night of the break-in. She probably never will. 

When they asked why the intruder left without taking anything, Trinity said something along the lines of “I guess his nerves must’ve gotten to him.”

She found it easier to say that than the truth: “My sex doll saved my life.” 

JESSIE SCHIEWE IS THE EDITOR OF OK WHATEVER. SHE BELIEVES IN MERMAIDS AND THRIFT SHOPS FOR EXERCISE.

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