Pumpkin Spice Up Your Life
Can’t get enough of the quintessential autumn flavor? Satisfy your cravings with these weird and unexpected products.
By Allyson Larcom
Though it might seem ubiquitous with fall, the phenomenon of pumpkin spice flavoring is more recent than you might think.
The unique taste combination arose only 50 years ago, when the American food manufacturer McCormick & Company began selling a blend of nutmeg, ginger, cinnamon, and allspice. They dubbed it “pumpkin spice.”
The modern-day autumnal obsession really hit its stride in the ‘90s, when cafes began incorporating pumpkin spice flavoring into various coffee drinks.
In recent years, as soon as the leaves start to turn, you can find pumpkin spice flavoring pretty much everywhere — and in everything. From cans of SPAM to personal lubricant, here are some of the strangest products you can find the alluring flavoring in.
Pumpkin Spice Cough Drops
An autumnal chill in the air means cold season is right around the corner. Fortunately, CVS Pharmacy sells limited-edition pumpkin spice cough drops that taste like cinnamon and anise. Each pumpkin spice cough drop contains 2 mg of menthol, an active ingredient that temporarily relieves coughing, irritation, and sore throats.
While some might find the combination of minty menthol and pumpkin spice flavoring to be somewhat off-putting, others say that it’s not that bad — plus, if you’re using them when you’re sick and stuffed up, you’re unlikely to notice anyways.
CVS also produces other seasonal cough drop flavors, such as caramel apple in case pumpkin spice isn’t quite what you’re looking for.
Pumpkin Spice Lattes...For Dogs
Get Fido in the fall spirit by spoiling him with a nutrient-packed can of pumpkin spice latte. In addition to being low in calories and ideal for pups who need to watch their weight, fiber-rich pumpkin is great for helping man’s best friend maintain optimal urinary and digestive health, and it’s a commonly used treatment for doggy diarrhea, too.
Each 4-ounce can — which is safe for both dogs and cats to consume — contains a mixture of goat milk, pumpkin, honey, cinnamon, and ginger, and is free of corn, soy, and wheat.
Although picky eaters might not touch the stuff, most dog owners have found that their pups love the classic autumn treat. What’s more, the ingredients are also safe for human consumption, so if you truly wanted to celebrate the beginning of fall with your dog, here’s your chance.
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Pumpkin Spice Hummus
If you’re not interested in pumpkin spice chips without any dip, don’t worry: food manufacturers Lantana, based out of Austin, Texas, and Marketside, Walmart’s store-brand label, have you covered.
By mixing fibrous pumpkin with chickpeas, they each offer different takes on pumpkin spice hummus, with Lantana’s featuring the addition of fruits such as cranberries and apricots and Marketside’s containing vanilla.
The idea of a dessert hummus, however, is hardly new. In 2017, a small company called Delighted By partnered with Shark Tank’s Mark Cuban to bring health-conscious hummuses, in flavors such as brownie, vanilla, chocolate mint, and snickerdoodle, to markets. Given this trajectory, it was only a matter of time until pumpkin spice hummus became a thing, too.
Pumpkin Spice Detail Spray
So you’ve got your dog and your diet covered. Need to pumpkin spice your whip, too? Luckily you can with pumpkin spice detail spray, courtesy of Adam’s Polishes, a car detailing service in Thornton, Colorado.
For an everlasting reminder of your grandma’s famous Thanksgiving pies, spray the solution onto the external surfaces and leather interiors of your car and then wipe it off with a microfiber cloth. The detailing spray goes for $12.99 per 16-ounce bottle or $44.99 per gallon, and is apparently a favorite of the founder’s mother. Go figure.
Pumpkin Spice Lube
Looking to spice things up in the bedroom? What about adding a bit of pumpkin into the mix?
Although rumors of pumpkin spice flavored condoms have swirled around the internet for years, much like pumpkin spice flavored Pringles, these mythical products are just cleverly edited Photoshop hoaxes.
Pumpkin spice flavored lube, however, is a different story. In the past, retailers like Astroglide and EMOTION have cashed in on the craze, although both personal lubricant companies have since discontinued their pumpkin spice flavors. However, retailer JO still sells a seasonal pumpkin spice lubricant, which is water-based, orange-colored, and goes for about $10 per bottle on Amazon.
Even though pumpkin spice lube tends to be marketed towards women, the scent and taste of pumpkin is supposedly an aphrodisiac for men, so there’s something for everyone to enjoy when using it.
Pumpkin Spice SPAM
The concept of pumpkin spice flavored SPAM began as a meme a handful of autumns ago, but in 2019, Hormel (the makers of SPAM) decided to cash in on the hype.
New on the market this year is pumpkin spice SPAM — a twist on the classic canned ham product thanks to the addition of cinnamon, cloves, allspice, and nutmeg.
The unique product hit the internet on September 23rd, and though Hormel intended to keep the new SPAM variety available throughout fall, the company sold out of its online-only stock in under seven hours. Now, the product is selling for as much as $45 dollars a can on eBay.
And, despite any initial misgivings with the concept, the new pumpkin spice flavored SPAM is said to actually taste good. Insider reports that its flavor is reminiscent of breakfast sausage and would pair well alongside a plate of eggs and waffles.
Pumpkin Spice Deodorant
After first launching the product in 2018, the personal hygiene company Native is once again offering a pumpkin spice deodorant available for a limited time only during the holiday season. Containing “notes of pumpkin, cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves,” it is reportedly so popular with customers that Native sells as many as 500 sticks a day.
Non-toxic and clear when you apply it, the deodorant is made with all-natural ingredients, like shea butter and coconut oil, so that your pits can smell good and stay soft and hydrated at the same time.
The deodorant goes for $12 a stick with a one-time purchase, but you can also subscribe for recurring shipments which drops the price to $10 a stick. Native also offers a pumpkin spice flavored deodorant tailored for sensitive skin, as well as bar soap and body wash in the same scent.
Pumpkin Spice Wine
In 2018, three different wineries produced their takes on pumpkin spice wine, all of which are back on the market again in 2019.
Three Lakes Winery, based out of Wisconsin, sells a Chardonnay-esque semi-sweet pumpkin wine that retails for $12.95 a bottle and, thanks to its popularity, is now available year-round.
For a pumpkin-flavored wine that is not spiced, there is the Pumpkin Bog by South Dakota-based Prairie Berry Winery. Crafted from a blend of 75% pumpkin and 25% cranberry, it sells for $16.50 a bottle.
Finally, California Fruit Wine Co. produces a true pumpkin spice wine — that is, pumpkin wine mulled with cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg, and ginger — which goes for $13 per bottle.
Although pumpkin wine doesn’t taste strongly like actual pumpkin, the inclusion of so many extra spices makes for a wholly original and seasonal taste.
Pumpkin Spice Beard Oil
Nothing says fall like that fresh-out-of-the-woods lumberjack look, and no lumberjack look is complete without a beard.
To take your Octobeard or Novembeard to a truly autumnal level, and to prevent dreaded cold weather dryness, a number of male hygiene companies now offer pumpkin spice beard oils. An important part of any self-care routine, beard oils condition facial hair, prevent dandruff, and help keep the skin underneath your beard moisturized and healthy. The fact that it will make the lower-half of your face smell like holiday memories from your childhood also doesn’t hurt.
Pumpkin Spice Bathroom Spray
Let’s be real: everyone’s shit stinks. Those with the foresight to prevent the tell-tale stench now have the option of giving their bathroom a decidedly more festive aroma thanks to Poo-Pourri’s innovative pumpkin chai toilet spray. Simply squirt a few sprays into the toilet basin before getting down to business and the oil-based solution will sit on top of the water, trapping any foul smells that plop beneath it.
As the “chai” in its title suggests, this toilet spray is not a true-blue pumpkin spice product, but with notes of cinnamon and citrus, it’s close enough.
Some might see pumpkin spice-scented shit as the logical endpoint for this phenomenon. Where can we, as a society, possibly take this fad after that? Only future autumnal innovations will tell.
(This article was originally published on October 25, 2019)
Allyson Larcom is a Boston-based writer originally from Salt Lake City, Utah. When she’s not writing about weird stuff, you can find her fawning over dogs, podcasting about cats, or teaching herself obscure languages.
Trav is an artist who lives in the U.K. near the beach. He enjoys swimming naked in cold water and skateboarding a lot.
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